Onwards.

I’ve resisted posting an update for a few weeks now. Mainly because there are only so many whiny blog posts I can write about a lack of interest in my book. Actually that’s not true, there are loads, but it’s probably not in my interests to post them all.

I sent Glitter Red Shoes and Sky Blue Gingham out to four agents. So far: three have rejected and one is outstanding. I could chase her. Maybe I should chase her? It’s been twelve weeks. But what if I chase and actually she’s just really busy and behind on her slush. Or worse, she just doesn’t like it enough to get back to me. Her website doesn’t say she won’t get back… but then again, nor does it say she will.

Maybe I could wait a little longer.

And that about sums the process up really. Should I, shouldn’t I, what if’s, maybes…

So: submit wider, or accept it isn’t good enough? Someone suggested self-publishing… that’s a cop out isn’t it? Or is it? There are a lot of people self-publishing, doing it really well and getting an agent and publishing deal as a result. And quite right too. But am I one of those people? How do I judge the quality of my work and  therefore self-publish, knowing that it is A. good enough, B. not a vanity project, and C… good enough!

Maybe the rejections are quite simply because it isn’t good enough.

And I’d hate to put my name to anything that isn’t … you know.

Which leads me back to submitting a bit wider. Or not. Maybe I’ll just start book three. And make that better than book two, which was better than book one… slowly, slowly catch my monkey? Maybe I’ll let a few people read it in the meantime so that I can get feedback. Use that feedback to shape my development. And I’ve spent the time writing it, it would be a shame for no-one to read it, wouldn’t it?

And with this post I realise, it’s uncertainty I’ve got to get used to. It might be the agent I’m chasing now, but then it will be the publishing deal, then the good reviews, then the next publishing deal… and so on and so on and so on. Man up Mansell, you’re in this for the long haul.

So, to book 3 I go… it will be better.

I updated my About Me page by the way, with the blurb for Glitter Red Shoes and Sky Blue Gingham, just in case the gorgeous girls who complained I hadn’t posted for a while are interested. Thanks to them for the push.

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